Why Should My Family Have Dinner Together?

today we're going to talk a little bit about whether or not your family eats dinner together but really why you should consider having your family eat dinner together and all the benefits that come from a family that has regular dinner with one another what's up you guys we're talking about family dinner and family get-togethers this is something that's actually becoming almost a figment of the past in a lot of families because of the way that life has gotten so busy you know in your life you're probably sitting there looking at your own life if you're like me I've got four kids I've got a job my wife works we've got soccer every night we've got running every night we've got church activities every night and the last thing that we want to do is make time for family dinner because it's a hassle it takes time to cook it it takes time to manage everybody's schedule and a lot of times it just doesn't even seem functional but today we're going to talk a little bit about why you should consider the importance of family dinner and what it actually does not just to the family system but to the individual in terms of managing stress and living a good wholehearted life so a lot of this stuff comes from research done by Doherty and he wrote a book called The intentional family that talks a little bit about intentional families and the benefits that come from families who do things on purpose in order to have a strong family relationship and then what that does is for the outcomes for children in terms of their performance in school their management of anxiety and emotions and deeper connections and relationships not just in the family but also in leadership with friendships with managing teacher child relationships all sorts of other things and the biggest factor that Doherty found is that families who have dinner together have better outcomes for their family system and for their children in all of those categories and the speculation is this that when we have family dinner together there's a few principles that go into play here the first thing is that we're having a joint experience on a regular basis we know in the research that when we spend time together and not just time together but when we have a shared experience together connection grows between people who have shared experience with one another so when we come together at night time and we sit down together as a family to have dinner you can't help but have a full experience together while you're eating a meal we also know that eating with somebody is a really common way that people join because there's something that's satiating about having food and having a meal that feels good and those satiating feelings can translate into feelings towards the people that we're also experiencing those things with so if I have a a good business meeting and I go to lunch with somebody there's a reason why I go to lunch with somebody or I go play golf with somebody it's because I'm having a shared experience with them and that's going to join me and them together in terms of relationship the other thing that having family dinner does is it allows us time to have regular conversations where there's check-ins with each other about the comings and goings of the day the things that were happening in your day and here's something you might consider when you're doing your family dinners or your family check-ins is to maybe do something intentional where you have everyone in the family go around the table and share something about their day I have some clients who use something they call Hilo Buffalo which is what's the best part of your day what was the hardest part of your day and what was the most random part of your day and getting your kids talking about being being observant of their own day what they experienced in their day and then being able to share it and practice empathy and understanding with one another is another way that we become connected to each other it's also another way to help manage emotions because now my family is starting to pay attention to not only to how they feel but how to articulate the things that they're feeling and also give other family members a chance to hear those things and practice listening skills practice empathy skills and that can all happen around a dinner table so really hard press I'm not the best at it myself again being a man with four daughters and a lot of activities to do consider the importance of what family dinner can do for you for your children for your family it's vitally important it yields massive results and hopefully this is helpful to you guys have a great day thank you so much for being here with me if you found this to be valuable for you please hit the like And subscribe button if you're facing particular struggles that you need help with or roadblocks that you're running into please submit a question I'd be happy to answer it for you [Music] thank you [Music]