Do you ever feel like you are falling short in every aspect of life and that no matter how hard you try to balance everything, nothing seems to get better?
I had a moment like this last week where a couple of my main priorities ran into conflict with one another. I felt conflicted between responsibilities that I am committed to with my church, feeling committed to clients at work, and trying to find time to be at home and spend time with my children. It seemed that no matter what choice I made, I would inevitably let someone down and feel a sense of guilt. Despite my best intentions it felt like I was failing.
I recently listened to a song called Workin’ On, by Colt Ford that made me smile.
The Lyrics of the song also caused me to pause and reflect on some areas of my life that are constantly in need of improvement. My mind instantly floated to my roles as a husband, father, friend, and provider that I constantly feel like I am falling short on. Not to mention seeking to keep my heart alive through healthy adventure and purpose. In the past, the constant struggle to balance these things has often led me down the pathway of shame and to feelings of inadequacy. I have often ended up down an emotionally dark alley being mugged by my own self criticism. Traveling this pathway has only yielded fruits of more shame, inadequacy, frustration and burnout in the past.
While it is an ongoing battle for me, I have found a better way to approach these things that leaves me feeling hopeful, strong, and committed to the constant pursuit of being the very best man I can be. The pathway to freedom is in learning to not only accept, but to fully embrace the opportunity that we have to be a work in progress until the day that we die. The measuring stick to success is our willingness to put our heart into the things that matter, course correct when we are off balance, and recommit with new learning and knowledge every time we fail.
I am finding that one of the secrets to a peaceful and a powerful life is to make commitments that are meaningful and difficult. By nature of being difficult, there will be times when I fall short, and when I fall short it will be an opportunity for increased growth. This, I believe is part of the way God designed life to be. There is no better way to grow and become something more than we are than by throwing ourselves into the challenges of life whole-heartedly and using our experiences to learn.
A few months ago I had a client remind me of this valuable principle of living. She said that her whole resolution for the year was that 2019 was “FailYear”. She said that she was trying to teach herself to embrace growth by giving herself permission to fail. I believe we might all benefit by following suit.
What are you workin’ on?