I recently had the chance to attend and present at the annual Utah Coalition Against Pornography (UCAP) Conference. The opening Keynote speaker, Matt Fradd, spoke about the essential reason that pornography is wrong. After referencing several reasons that are often given (health issues, changing the brain chemistry, strained relationships, etc), he claimed that none of these are THE reason that porn is essentially wrong.  He then shared a message about what love is and shared that real love never takes and never leaves one feeling used.  He then shared the following song by Kelly Clarkston (Piece by Piece) to illustrate the emotion of what it feels like to be abandoned and used.   It caused me to pause and think about my current relationships, wondering if I am REALLY loving those in my life including my wife and my children. I reflected back on the video by Rabbi Dr. Abraham Twerski. Am I invested in their well-being for them or for me? I realized that even though I am moving in the right direction and happy with my current relationships there may still be room for improvement in the area of really loving those close to me. How about you?
– Tyler Patrick, LMFT